Beautiful People: You Suck

by alphamonkey on January 13, 2004 · 0 comments

in Miscellany

Since I’m devoid of Transmuto’s cold, yet exciting, embrace whilst I’m slinging coffee for the masses (and former personality Kevin Nealon. Really.), I have to wait until you’ve gone past it to address the beauty issue.

First off…the idea that we are inclined toward body modification in the pursuit of a culture’s standard of beauty is correct, but we’re also inclined to relish in violent conflict. That doesn’t mean it’s a behavior to be encouraged. I’m not going to pull some ‘your body is a temple’ hippie bullshit. Nor am I going to play the Buddist/Taoist card of harmony in nature. Here’s why the trend toward creating a never-ending chain of beautiful people must stop:

Beautiful people don’t make good rock n’ roll. (Which is why Iggy Pop and Joey Ramone’s fingernails have more talent than The Strokes, John Mayer, and Justin Timberlake combined. Or try this: Who’s prettier: Tyrese or Andre3000. Now which one of them made the single best album of 2003? That’s right..the goofy looking one)
Beautiful people don’t write great novels. (Which is why you don’t see a lot of glamour shots of Phillip Roth and Stephen Faulkner)
Beautiful people don’t write/direct good films. (Which is why Jim Jarmousch and Johnny Depp were on opposite sides of the camera)

Beautiful people are incapable of creating great art.

“The only true currency in this bankrupt world…is what you share with someone else when you’re uncool.” – Lester Bangs. (Rock Critic extraordinare)

Great art is made by uncool and unattractive people who may desperately wish they weren’t so, but that’s why it’s so fucking good in the first place.

The more attractive someone is, the LESS serious I take them. What the fuck do they know about want, need, or desperation? What do they know about longing and loss? Not a gawdamn thing.

I’m going to have to cut this short before my rage circuit kicks in. But before I do, Jae: Linda got quite a bit of attention on this board before her picture was posted. In fact, she’s received LESS since then.

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