Steve Ballmer Pitches Windows 1.0

by alphamonkey on September 22, 2004 · 3 comments

in Sci-Tech

I love Steve Ballmer.  I know it’s not cool to like Microsoft, but I’m fascinated by Ballmer’s complete lack of image self-protection.  I’m sure everyone has seen the Miami Sound Machine freak-out video (Which I unfortunately do not have at hand), but I just love how willing Steve is to go the extra mile. 

I mean c’mon….Nobody really expects that this guy thinks he’s Cary Grant, do they? When you’re a’hollerin’ and a’dancin’ (kinda) all over the place to the sounds of MSM with the kind of reckless abandon you’d find normally restricted to communes and light-security mental health institutions, I’m sure the inner you isn’t thinking ‘God damn, I look cool right now!”.  Let’s face it, Viking Beserker rages aren’t half as extreme as that performace was. So kudos to Mr. B for being ballsy enough to put himself out there like that.

That said, I dunno about this one.  It certainly looks older (and Ballmer does look younger), but it seems a wee bit too intentionally self-aware to be a serious ad, and I’d like to think that even in 1986 Microsoft had at least one guy on the staff that would have the guts to say “Uh, guys…maybe Steve isn’t the guy we should have pimping our gear”.  But regardless, I love how his voice cracks the more excited he gets.

If anyone could tell me the story behind this, I’d love to hear it.

Doesn't that just get you all a'tingle?

(click for ad-pitching video goodness)

Addendum!  The Dancing Ballmer vid! –The Good Reverend

Ask and ye shall receive! I happen to have the video that shows the UnHoly Union of Ballmer and Miami Sound Machine.

But let me just say this – after seeing your video, AM, I am now a Ballmer fan.  Until today, I had only witnessed the dancing video, and assumed that this was another pathetic attempt by some corporate stiff to be artificially wacky and zany to push a product.  I had him placed right down there with morning show rock DJs.  But your vid changes everything.  Ballmer really and truly is off his tit. I mean that in only the most complimentary way.  Hell, I bet he’s even a Python fan. 

Wow, maybe mega-corporation CEOs and I aren’t so different after all (excepting of course the assloads of cash, fame, travelling the world, trophy wives, mistresses, high-powered business negotiations, political influence… okay I’ll stop there).

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  • Shadow Stalker

    Wow, that is hilarious.  It can’t be real though; I don’t think Windows 1.0 switched windows that fast.  I sure miss those old CGA monitors though.  All they could display was magenta, cyan, and gray, and people still tried to do color graphics.

    Ballmer is great.  I really do respect him as an executive for the same reason that you do, he just isn’t afraid to be a little silly when he’s excited about his product.  I think politicians could use some of that character.

    Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but the PO Box is funny too.  286-DOS.  I’m sure Microsoft would love to eighty-six denial of service.  Or maybe DOS is actually DOS, it works either way.

  • Souped_up_on_Jihad

    developers, Develpers, DEvelopers, DEVELOPERS! That’s all I have to say, but then again, I have been hitting the Miller High Life and Frozen Burritos pretty hard tonight…

  • .alphamonkey.

    Skipping the Nutella?

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