Dear Reality Television Producers:

by alphamonkey on December 15, 2004 · 22 comments

in Stupid People

You’re killing humanity. Please stop!

Fox has announced it’s latest visual sodomization of your mind: Who’s Your Daddy? A show in which an adopted child has to pick out their biological father from a pool of 8 candidates

  • Reddit
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Digg
  • del.icio.us
  • LinkedIn
  • RSS
  • StumbleUpon
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Posterous
  • Tumblr
  • http://www.livejournal.com/users/om_mani_padme olivesmarch4th

    Ugh.

  • fealty2dahriyah

    the first 3 episodes are her in therapy, trying to figure out why he left. why daddy why….

    I like reality tv, it helps remind me of how deep down we are all shallow, insecure, and will do anything for attention or money.

  • Just Plain Bob

    Hey man. Screw your choice of image. I LIKED zoobilee zoo.

  • http://www.dadsbigplan.com .alphamonkey.

    That came back from a GIS for “Fox”. That was the first one that was pr0n or furry-related.

    And Zoobliee Zoo SUCKED.

  • http://www.livejournal.com/users/shadwstalkr Shadow Stalker

    NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

  • http://360.yahoo.com/razorfine_review Thundarr

    I did see an article in the KC Star last month that all reality tv shows were down in ratings this year, some by more than 50%.  Hopefully we won’t have to take this for much longer.  By the way reality tv is the 10:00 news or a documentary on the history channel.  The crap these smut peddlers pump out is neither reality nor television.

  • http://www.livejournal.com/users/shadwstalkr Shadow Stalker

    Exactly.  Stop calling game shows reality tv.

  • fealty2dahriyah

    sadly this is economics at play like usual, it’s way too cheap to cut writers out of the budget. this is why a lot of the world hates our tv culture, not reality tv, but that because we make so much “product” that we can sell it for cheaper than lesser quality culturally local shows. it’s the same reason why stations is lesser demographic areas show local news before and after the national news. simply it’s cheaper to produce 2 shitty news casts than to rent sitcome episodes.

  • http://cananopie.pitas.com Cananopie

    “If you watch the show, it’s going to be impossible for you not to get choked up,”

    For some reason I have a hard time “choking up” when I know in the background someone is going “Okay, zoom in a little more, make sure you get the tear glistening, have her pause a little longer for dramatic affect, ok! Now go in for the hug! There, perfect, the audience will eat that up and the ratings will go through the roof.”

  • Just Plain Bob

    So, what happens if you DON’T pick right? no money, and they whisk dad away into the Witness Protection Program?

  • Just Plain Bob

    Yo momma sure seems to.

  • Just Plain Bob

    I long for the days when i was the least mature member of these discussions. I pine for the days when my posts were the least pleasant to read!

  • Just Plain Bob

    Millions of people see this site every day… millions of people gasp in awe at the scathing remarks of Alphamonkey, ShadowStalker, The Good Reverend, and others. millions stare in wonder at the vicious hatred of Harvestor. Millions thrill to the educated repartee of Thundarr and myself.

    and millions of people see you.

    attention.jpg

  • Just Plain Bob

    dammit.

  • http://www.dadsbigplan.com .alphamonkey.

    Karmetically speaking, that was effin’ awesome.

  • Just Plain Bob

    i don’t like karma.

    i’m going to make this work, even though it won’t be funny anymore.

  • Just Plain Bob

    Friday night? stopped in here between picking up a friend of mine from pennsylvania (she got a ride from a friend of hers in college, which is in kentucky, and PA is just closer to home) and driving over to another friend’s house for an all nighter. nights happen late around here. actually i just walked in from dropping people off…

    and you know what? i’m going to make this work, even though it isn’t funny anymore.

    attention.jpg

  • Just Plain Bob

    Fuck yo’ couch!

  • http://www.dadsbigplan.com .alphamonkey.

    Wha?

  • Just Plain Bob

    i said fuck yo’ couch, monkey! you can get another one!

    BUT WHAT ABOUT MAH LEGS!

  • http://www.dadsbigplan.com .alphamonkey.

    Ah. Chappelle.

  • Just Plain Bob

    i’m still waiting on the “I’m Rick James’ ghost, bitch!” sketch.

Previous post:

Next post: