The Internet makes you stupid.

by alphamonkey on January 21, 2005 · 18 comments

in Stupid People

It also makes you greedy and self-centered, judging from this little forum mined nugget that Cananopie hipped us on.  Yes, it’s a girl who is just flat out asking for $4000 dollars to buy a car, using only her sense of entitlement and her soon-to-be-porn ‘star’ looks. 

I suppose I shouldn’t be suprised.  After all, when eBay can manage to find a collection of idiots to drop $29K on a 10 year old grilled cheese sandwich you can’t fault a girl for trying to rake in 4 grand by almost showing her boobs.

I purposely held off from posting this while it was live because the thought that someone might actually bid on this is enough to drive me completely insane(r).  Thankfully in a rare show of restraint, not a single lonely man opened his wallet just because a self-proclaimed hot girl asked him to.  I’m sure there had to be at least a couple of guys who were seriously considering it.  Let’s imagine one inner dialogue, shall we?

Lonely Man’s Id: Oh, c’mon!  It’s just four grand!  We’ll spend at least that amount on porn this year!  If we do it, she’ll probably at least send dirty pictures of herself!

Lonely Man’s SuperEgo: I’m not paying 4 grand for some random chick to get a car. 

Lonely Man’s Ego: Why don’t we just wait for her to make her inevitable descent into amateur porn and then we’ll just download it for free?

Alll: Huzzah!

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1 Thundarr January 21, 2005 at 1:12 pm

So that’s what you needed the money for?  You told me it was an operation!  Pay up monkey!

2 .alphamonkey. January 21, 2005 at 1:49 pm

Oh, c’mon! That’s your best effort? You are a Kevin Smith fan.

3 Thundarr January 21, 2005 at 3:58 pm

Seriously, I want my 4G’s back if you blew it all on this.  You told me you needed that sex change operation, to be the real you for the first time in your life.  I can’t believe I trusted you!

4 .alphamonkey. January 21, 2005 at 4:25 pm

No, SERIOUSLY. Weak, stupid, and half-hearted.

5 The Good Reverend January 21, 2005 at 8:30 pm

Now what have I told you about rating digs against yourself, AlphaMonkey.  We’ve covered this! wink

6 .alphamonkey. January 22, 2005 at 3:35 pm

Yes, yes. We went over it. And I still disagree.

7 mackjaz January 21, 2005 at 2:26 pm

I love the part about not bidding if you have neg feedback.  That’s really going the extra mile in the gall department.

8 Souped_up_on_Jihad January 21, 2005 at 6:50 pm

Just what “hot” chicks need, more advantages. If she were ugly and had a rough life or something, I might have sent her like $5 or something.

9 Cananopie January 21, 2005 at 6:56 pm

Haha, yes. I’m so happy I gave a link worthy of posting.

10 .alphamonkey. January 21, 2005 at 7:00 pm

I like that her other auctions are for Chihuahua leg warmers and a Nitros huffer.

She sounds like a real winner.

11 mackjaz January 21, 2005 at 7:49 pm

Auction is closed?  What happened?  Did she get some?  Those are fake roses, by the way – a stunning faux pas in the elite, tight-knit ebay community.

12 The Good Reverend January 21, 2005 at 8:27 pm

haha!  quality.

13 The Good Reverend January 21, 2005 at 8:41 pm

I will be the minority opinion here.  I say “More Power to Her!” While I think it would be ridiculous to give her money, I nonetheless applaud her entrepreneurism.

We all have assets and liabilities, and getting along in society is about using one to cover the others.  She is poor, but she is also fucking hot – and “dirty hot” at that.  She has decided to see what she can get for it.  No different than a stripper flaunting their breasts in a guy’s face for dollar bills.

Pretty girls got a ticket to ride in life – simple fact.  There are so many men that will do so much just for the illusion of having sex with said female.  She’s just one more stripper, providing the illusion for a little cash.  Go for it, girl.

14 Shadow Stalker January 21, 2005 at 10:34 pm

But she’s not like a stripper.  She’s not even like an amateur porn girl.  She’s just saying that she’s hot, so someone should send her money.  She’s just a bum, and a shitty one.  She’s not even hot.  She could at least get somebody who can draw a straight line to do her eyebrows.

15 Cananopie January 22, 2005 at 1:29 pm

I also have to say Good Reverend that I might agree with you IF she offered anything but a “maybe a thank you letter”. She wasn’t offering her boobs or anything except for some shoulder and a buttload of makeup. That’s just being ridiculous.

16 The Good Reverend January 22, 2005 at 4:53 pm

Well yes, but how do you haggle when buying a car?  You waaaay low ball the sticker price, to right on the borderline between “desperate dealer might take it” and “plain ridiculous”.  You see what you can get away with, since that’s exactly what the dealer is going to try on you.

This girl just low-balled the offer in her own way.  She put in about 5 minutes worth of effort on Ebay in the hopes that some desperate sod would bite.  I’m happy to see that no one did.  So, she will probably come up a little bit in her offer next time (maybe a vid of some “girls gone wild” type stuff).

She’s just playing the game.  She lowballed the offer too far, but I hold no malice against her for trying. smile

17 .alphamonkey. January 22, 2005 at 4:57 pm

I refuse to applaud or encourage this behavior.  It’s reprehensible and ethically bankrupt.

Wow…you really are Ayn Rand’s kind of reader.

18 Shadow Stalker January 22, 2005 at 6:13 pm

Did you notice this was the second time she’s listed this auction?

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