I am fiercely proud of my Germanic heritage, which is why it pains me greatly to always know in the back of mind that, as Norm MacDonald put it, Germans love David Hasselhoff.
I mean, what the hell! We conquered the Roman Empire! We gave the world moveable type! The Reformation! The best gawddamn bier in the world! And now, Hasselhoff? Embarrassing.
Which is why I offer a link to the 2005 Hasselhoff calendar. It contains pics of Hasselhoff in all his ridiculous glory. German brothers and sisters – look at the calendar! See the fool, swinging on tires and playing with puppies! Shake off this spell that Hasselhoff has put on you! Think of your children!
Thanks to Sarah D. for the calendar. And now for a small taste…
(I believe this calendar was made as a joke and is not an actual product of Hasselhoff Industries. If I am wrong, and you are a representative of Hasselhoff Industries – first, hahaha! You work for Hasselhoff Industries! Secondly, email me and I’ll take it down.)