The five or six of you who don’t live in the greater Kansas City metro area might not know that the Aryan Nation is moving it’s national headquarters to Kansas City, Kansas. Does anyone else find it ironic that the Aryan Nations are now a people without land?While I could sit on my high, high horse in Missouri and laugh at all this, most people don’t realize there are two Kansas Cities. Looks like we’re all in this together.
We can’t get rid of these assholes, since, much to John Ashcroft’s chagrin, this is still a free county. So until they continue to wander in search of a land without people (to hate), we might as well make the best of it. To do my part, I’ve come up with ten reasons why hosting the Aryan Nations will be good for Kansas City:
- The economic boon as literally tens of members flood gas station cigarette counters and liquor stores, decimating strategic Parliment and Coors Light reserves.
- Most Wyandotte Co. residents won’t notice a change.
- They can’t swing the vote any further right.
- We’ll be the world leaders in prison gang technology.
- Local weatherman Bryan Busby can make snide remarks about the weather in the Aryan Nation.
- Our long maligned mayors will get to prove their mettle with statements like, “Racism won’t be tolerated.” The sheer bravery makes me all misty.
- The Phelps family will finally have a reason to use the good China.
- The Aryan Nations Olympics will get us on ESPN.
- Three words: after school programs.
- Johnson Co. will look downright tolerant.
- The Kansas Speedway is only twenty minutes away.