The Terrific Transbuddha Tuesday Trailer House

by alphamonkey on April 10, 2007 · 0 comments

in Film

What’s better than a trailertastic load o’ links dropped hot for you on a Tuesday?  Well, probably at least a couple of things, but it’s not like you’re paying for this.  HiDef links below.

Like Rear Window?  Who doesn’t?  Disturbia puts a new spin on Hitchcock’s formula when a teen under house arrest (Shia LeBeeouf) and his lovely new gal Friday (Sarah Roemer – in the Grace Kelly role) believe his neighbor (David Morse) just might be a killer.  We’ve seen it and we’ll spin the review for you when it hits theaters on Friday.

Halle Berry plays an investigative reporter who believes her friend was killed by a powerful ad exec (Bruce Willis) in this thriller.  Muldoon’s seen Perfect Stranger and he’ll give you the skinny on Friday.

Based on the Dark Horse Comics graphic novel, a Viking child is left behind in North America to be raised by Native Americans, but when the Norse warriors return 25 years later Ghost (Karl Urban) must find his destiny in Pathfinder.  You’ll have to wait ‘til Friday for our review, but it has to be better than Urban’s last summer flick right?  Right?!

Want to pay for what you can watch for free on Cartoon Network?  Well then, have I got a deal for you!!  Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters, a flick starring a shake, a fry, and a wad of meat who discover that “an immortal piece of exercise equipment threatens the balance of galactic peace,” opens wide on Friday.

In what has to be thd dumbest idea since Torque, director Andy Cheng gives us Redline which looks like a really dumbed down version of The Cannonball Run…II (stop and consider that for a moment) as hot, but dumb, models race and crash hot cars across the country.  It crashes into theaters on Friday.

Speaking of dumb ideas, Molly Shannon stars a a secretary whose life goes downhill after her dog dies in Year of the Dog.  Molly Shannon hamming it up for 97 minutes.  Seriously, there is no power on this planet to get me to see this film – even if it was written and directed by Mike White.  It opens in limited release on Friday.

And if that’s not enough for you there’s tons of flicks out in limited release including Everything’s Gone Green from director Paul Fox, Slow Burn with Ray Liotta and Enterprise‘s Jolene Blalock (and RF favorite Chiwetel Ejiofor), Lonely Hearts starring John Travolta and Salma Hayek, the tale of a tortured soldier getting on with his life Private Fears In Public Places, the softcore Japense porn flick The Glamorous Life of Sachiko Hanai, Red Road with Kate Dickie and Tony Curran, and writer/director Bill Plympton’s animated horror/comedy about prom night murder and revenge Hair High.

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