March 2010

Bionic Duckling

by ShadowStalker on March 31, 2010 · 2 comments

in Sci/Tech

The Bionic Duckling wasn’t quite as intimidating as Jaime Sommers and lacked Steve Austin‘s charm. Realizing their grave mistake, the OSI sent the duckling on a suicide mission to eliminate the vicious Clockwork Turtle. Just because we can rebuild it doesn’t mean we should.

And this wind-up crocodile looks like something The Penguin would unleash on Gotham.


Ext. – Dusk. The ‘monkey family is lounging on the deck. alpha & k sip margaritas*, while the Terror Twins play with matchbox cars on their town mat. Suddenly Zoe starts spinning around on the mat:

The Best of The Electric Slide - 45 minutes of blissful silence...alpha: Hey, Zoe…are you going to breakdance?
Zoe: Yes!
alpha: Can you do a windmill?
Zoe: No!
alpha: Can you do the Worm?
Zoe: No!
alpha: Can you at least do the Electric Slide?
Zoe: Yes!
alpha: Well then what are you waiting for? Show me!

Zoe gets up, spins around on the mat, and then plops down on her butt, scooting forward before yelling “SLIDE!” as she flops her legs outward.

alpha: I’m pretty sure the Electric Slide doesn’t end with you on the ground with your legs spread.
K: Not since 1976, at least….

*Well, I had a margarita. K was enjoying a grapefruit/tequila concoction she dubbed the “Pink Pussy Sunset”. Alcohol is serious bizniz at Fort Awesome.


Stallone. Statham. Li. Lundgren. Rourke. Roberts. Willis. Schwarzenegger. That’s right, the trailer for The Expendables has finally hit the ‘net:

The Expendables Trailer


Scientists Successfully Teach Gorilla It Will Die Someday


Oh, snap!

by alphamonkey on March 31, 2010 · 0 comments

in Uncategorized

The Cap’n got mad when we made fun of his Condorman shirt and decided to pour maple syrup on our Categories server. So bear with us as we try de-syrup-ify our categories/tags.

Music by Nada Surf! (Blankest Year)


I will freely admit to loving the original Tron unconditionally. It seems the guys who made this fan trailer agree with me:

A little long, but DAMN! With the sequel on it’s way I sat down and watched this last night. Yeah, it still holds up. And after seeing this I kinda want to watch it again.


I admit it.. I’d so buy these




Design student Kenichi Tanaka teaches you more than you could possibly want to know about Japan in this stylish video.

It looks like Japan’s post-war strategy was along the lines of, “If we can’t have the world, nobody gets it.”


If you take a farm boy into space you can’t be all that surprised when he’s fascinated with the sophisticated technology of…a door.

Luke Skywalker Has OCD