Starbucks’ lingo makes people go insane

by Cap'n Carrot on August 16, 2010 · 9 comments

in In the News,News,Stupid People

This past weekend a Starbucks customer finally had enough with the company’s lingo and had to be escorted out by the police when she refused to use the exact phrase “without butter or cheese” when ordering a multigrain bagel. Did the woman overreact by going ballistic on a Stabucks employee? Most definitely, but you could say the same for the barista who could have instantly diffused the situation by simply selling her a bagel. Me, I’m all for anyone telling Starbucks (and any other brand) to stick it when they attempt to create their own language in an attempt to seem cool, hip, or cutting-edge. So, to celebrate that thought, here’s this clip of Role Models on the subject of a venti large cup of coffee.

No, large means large

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  • alphamonkey

    I’ll remember these comments the next time you order a Route 44 cherry limeade. I’m no mathelete, but I’m pretty sure “Route 44” isn’t a widely known unit of measurement.

    And while I’m loathe to correct Mr. Rudd, “grande” does indeed mean “large” in Italian.

    • Cap’n Carrot

      It is however 44oz, and Sonic isn’t asking me to master a foreign language to complete my order.

      • alphamonkey

        Yet Taco Bell gets a pass? I got news for ya, buddy: “Burrito” ain’t English.

        • Cap’n Carrot

          Explain to me how “burrito” is a size issue. I’m pretty sure if you ask for the big burrito Taco Bell has no problem giving you the grande (or whatever they call it) instead of acting all pissy and demanding you call it by its “correct” name before giving it to you.

          If someone is willing to shell out $6 for a cup of coffee you should thank them and let them call it whatever they want.

          • alphamonkey

            I’m just sayin’: You can’t give Starbucks shit for something that’s done all over the place. And to be precise: This incident in question was a woman refusing to answer when the barista was trying to complete the order. I mean really, is it so fucking hard to say “No thanks, plain is fine”? There’s a write-up in the New York Post that gives a little more backstory (in that the woman is a serial nuisance at the store).

          • Cap’n Carrot

            That it’s done all over is a valid, but not great, argument. The difference with Starbucks, however, is how they seem to delight in forcing you to use the language where most places will accept small, medium, large, etc., even if that’s not what it says on the menu.

          • Cap’n Carrot

            And yes the woman was being difficult, and was acting like a child, but was it so hard for the barista to recognize that the woman just wanted a plain bagel, be a better person, act like a grownup, and give it to her? We all know customers can be pains, and sometimes unbelievably aggrevating, but getting into a pissing contest with them isn’t going to solve anything. How much $$ do you think they lost with her holding up the line instead of just completing her order?

          • alphamonkey

            I’d say they were probably happy the Starbucks finally kicked her out and (hopefully) embarrassed her enough not to return. I’ve dealt with enough asshats on the other side of the counter that the barista gets my sympathy on this one.

            Remind me to tell you the stories of Cinnamon Scone Man someday…

            Lastly: Who in their right mind gets a bagel from Starbucks in New York, of all places? That’s like going to McDonald’s after hitting the Louvre.

  • lintly

    Fuck Starbucks in their stupid asses. It’s shitty coffee for $5. Dunn Brothers FTW!!!

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