Harvestor of Bondo

War in color… Good Republicans doing their best to keep us free.

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People don’t understand the pressures that the Discovery Channel dishes out to greasers like me. Women stare at skinny models in the latest COSMO and hate themselves… their bodies… their very being. They know they should get their FAT asses off the couch and start working towards Heidi Fleiss, but they always have excuses.

I can’t afford excuses. The children won’t let me give in to laziness or professionalism or even the drugs. I have to conform to the vision of Lucifer and his little shits. And the Discovery Channel just doesn’t get it. They say I’m too far out into left field. That I am a bad roll model. That Jesse is more marketable.

I refuse to believe it. I am SEXY.

And to appease the link greed. Raise money the right way… Kill the bunny.

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The masses like to pay lazy people with no jobs. They like big governments with lots of rules and laws. They like to sit idly by while religous freaks fly airplanes into our buildings. They like to go after our president and denounce our troops. They suck.

Republicans are fuckin punk rock man…

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