George Lucas has childhood rapist fingers

The past hour the Internet has been all abuzz with news that George Lucas has sold Lucasfilm, Industrial Light & Magic, Skywalker Sound, and the rights to the expanded Star Wars universe to Disney for $4.05 billion (half in cash and half in 40 million shares of Disney). Kathleen Kennedy, current co-chairman of Lucasfilm, will take over as President of the company and serve as executive producer for Star Wars: Episode VII which is tentatively scheduled for a 2015 release date. I’ve decided to be cautiously optimistic, but someone may want to give teh ‘monkey a hug as he’s currently crawled up in a ball under his desk muttering obscenities and planning a way to kill everyone involved.

[via New York Times]

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The reason it’s funny is because it’s true.

The MAD Strip Club — Rods & Cones: Star Wars

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Oh George, you might tell the people who work for you that sending cease-and-desist letters to fans who had planned to get together to celebrate your cinematic genius and their undying love of all things Star Wars (possibly even including Jar Jar Binks!) probably isn’t going to earn you points with any member of your fanbase (with the possible exception of Mark Zuckerberg).

Read the full account here.

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Well, crap…. I’ve kinda let myself not think about BioWare’s big foray into MMORPGs, aka Star Wars: The Old Republic. However, BioWare decided to drop a new trailer at the 2011 E3 designed to grab me by the collar and smack me around until I needed to grab a textbook to hide my nerdly shame/excitement. Behold! The lastest SWtOR trailer, “Return” :

I’ll let you clean yourself up a little.

All better? Let’s talk turkey for a sec: As a fairly long-term World of Warcraft player, this trailer got me excited for how the classes fit together (especially since this is the first cinematic to give us any idea what the fighting styles might look like). Trooper, Bounty Hunter (or in this case) Smuggler, Jedi (up to 4 specializations IIRC) are meant to be able to balance the needs of the fight without requiring a specific class (Goodbye to waiting around for 2 hours while someone tracks down a tank or that last DPS player!) I’m not sure how cover mechanics will fit into gameplay (though I’m curious to find out), but I don’t mind admitting: SWtOR is the first SW themed property I’ve seen in ages that gets me EXCITED to spend more time in that galaxy far, far away. And this trailer (which is apparently the opening clip of the game) has certainly upped that ante a bit.

So yes, George Lucas will once again get to slide his childhood-rapist fingers deep into my jean pockets for another go. I suppose I’ll just have to take comfort in the fact that I’ll just be one of thousands. And since the Cap’n’s fondest wish is to mow down thousands and thousands of innocents under the vicious blades of his Sith lightsaber, I won’t be alone.

Yeah, I figured out a way to make an Usher/Star Wars reference in the title. THAT’S HOW I ROLL.

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