movie reviews

Red Sparrow

by Cap'n Carrot on March 1, 2018 · 0 comments

in Film

red-sparrow-pic2

Adapted from Jason Matthews2013 novel of the same name (which apparently “borrowed” heavily from Black Widow‘s comic history), and starring Oscar-winning actress Jennifer Lawrence, Red Sparrow is a disappointment in every since of the word. This movie is B-A-D. A slow burn spy thriller, with jolts of quick-cut stylized action, plot holes big enough to drive the Death Star through, and sex scenes so laughable only Showgirls fans can truly appreciate them, the film is a complete waste of time for everyone involved. For the audience, it’s an excruciating, although sometimes laughably bad, experience.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

Love, Simon

by Cap'n Carrot on February 27, 2018 · 0 comments

in Film

love-simon-pic1

I’m a sucker for a good coming of age story. In many ways Love, Simon is fairly by the book. We’re given a likable high school student dealing with school, friends, and his first crush. The difference from most of these types of mainstream films, is that Simon (Nick Robinson) is gay. What makes the film work is that while Simon frets about what others will think of him if they learn the truth, his gayness doesn’t solely define him as a character.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

Annihilation

by Cap'n Carrot on February 22, 2018 · 0 comments

in Film

annihilation-pic1

I love Ex Machina (enough to name it my favorite film of 2015), but holy hell is director Alex Garland‘s follow-up project a clusterfuck. Based on the novel of the same name by Jeff VanderMeer, Annihilation focuses on a biologist and former soldier (Natalie Portman) who chooses to journey into a rainbow-curtain rift (referred to as a shimmer) with four other female scientists (Jennifer Jason Leigh, Gina Rodriguez, Tuva Novotny, and Tessa Thompson) in hopes of understanding what is happening inside and what the anomaly did to her husband (Oscar Isaac) who was the only soldier sent from any of the previous expeditions to make it out alive.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

Black Panther

by Cap'n Carrot on February 15, 2018 · 0 comments

in Film

black-panther-pic4

While ultimately falling into the category of a lesser Marvel film, there’s still quite a bit to enjoy about Black Panther which develops the African country of Wakanda (which is far more advanced than almost anyone in the outside world suspects). Black Panther seems a bit out of place as Marvel gears up for its big crossover cosmic event in Infinity War as it is arguably the least connected film to the larger overall franchise since the first movies premiered a decade ago.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

Hostiles

by Cap'n Carrot on January 19, 2018 · 0 comments

in Film

hostiles-pic2

Hostiles is a wagon train movie, without the wagon train. Christian Bale stars as Capt. Joseph J. Blocker, a career solider who has spent the better part of two decades fighting Native Americans in the late 19th Century. A reluctant Blocker is ordered to escort an old enemy (Wes Studi) and his family (Adam Beach, Xavier Horsechief, Q’orianka Kilcher, and Tanaya Beatty) from New Mexico to Montana and deliver them safely home after years of being prisoners of the Union Army. Along the way, the group will pick-up a woman (Rosamund Pike) whose family was brutally killed in the film’s opening scene and a prisoner (Ben Foster) with a connection to Blocker’s past.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

I, Tonya

by Cap'n Carrot on January 12, 2018 · 0 comments

in Film

i-tonya-pic1

I, Tonya is a compelling, if flawed, look at the life and career of Tonya Harding (Margot Robbie) memorable mostly for the terrific performances of Robbie and co-star Allison Janney (as Tonya’s mother). Framed as flashbacks told through a series of current interviews (which were actually shot as reference for the script) we watch a young Tonya struggle with acceptance in ice skating despite her obvious talent, her troubled relationships with her mother and husband (Sebastian Stan), and the events leading up to the attack on rival Nancy Kerrigan (Caitlin Carver).

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

Molly’s Game

by Cap'n Carrot on December 27, 2017 · 0 comments

in Film

mollys-game-pic1

In choosing to adapt Molly Bloom‘s true story, writer/director Aaron Sorkin begins with an already intriguing subject matter which is only helped by his trademark pacing and smart dialogue. Jessica Chastain is terrific as the failed amateur skier whose life took a dramatic twist after washing out of Olympic qualifying to become the what tabloids dubbed the “poker princess.” Filled with celebrities and high rollers, Molly Brown ran the world’s most exclusive high-stakes poker game for almost a decade before being arrested by the FBI. Sorkin rounds out the cast with Idris Elba as Molly’s lawyer, Kevin Costner as Molly’s father, and Michael Cera as one of the regulars at Molly’s games.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

pitch-perfect-3-pic2

Screenwriters Kay Cannon and Mike White bend over backwards the third time around to find a plausible reason to reunite the Barden Bellas for a final chance to sing and compete for glory. Given the glut of game shows which are music-based it would seem pretty easy to do. However, Pitch Perfect 3 goes old school and instead sends our ladies overseas to perform on a USO tour for American servicemen abroad. And, because everything in this series has to be about competition, the Bellas are pitted against the other bands competing for an opening act spot for prestigious musician DJ Khaled (playing himself).

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

Downsizing

by Cap'n Carrot on December 21, 2017 · 0 comments

in Film

downsizing-pic1

Downsizing is an odd film with an intriguing premise and unusual concept that gets a little lost along the way as the film takes a hard-right turn leaving you unsure, exactly, where the story is ultimately heading. Matt Damon and Kristen Wiig star as a couple who decide to take part in an unusual scientific adventure which will shrink them to only a few centimeters tall. Initially created as a way to preserve the world’s dwindling resources, downsizing gains popularity as a middle-income family like the Safraneks can live like kings for only a fraction of the price in ritzy miniature communities. Of course, things don’t go exactly as planned.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }

jumanji-welcome-to-the-jungle-pic1

1995’s Jumanji isn’t a great adaptation of the award-winning children’s book about a game which brings jungle chaos to the real world, but it works well-enough as a family-friendly adventure. Fast-forward to 2017 and Jumanji is reinvented as a video game, a concept which gives the sequel/remake the ability to cast big name stars playing kids trapped in the game. While the concept is initially interesting, nothing about the plot makes sense in the structure of a video game as the script quickly devolves into a hot mess.

[click to continue…]

{ 0 comments }