Not sure this exactly qualifies as “breaking news” (as it seems to happen in Washington D.C. every day of the week), but the short video still worth a look for fans of The Onion.
Authorities On Alert As Hundreds Of Crazed Sociopaths Enter Congressional Chambers
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The Onion reports how Peter Jackson was careful not only to make sure The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey stayed true to not only J.R.R. Tolkien’s original work but also the The Hobbit-themed Denny’s Menu.
Peter Jackson’s ‘The Hobbit’ Stays Faithful To Original Book, Denny’s Menu
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The Onion reports that Apple has come to an unusual solution to problems of their iPhone Maps application by rearranging the Earth’s geography to match the inaccuracies of their software.
Apple Promises To Fix Glitches In Map Software By Rearranging Earth’s Geography
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With President Barack Obama reelected and back in office for another four years, The Onion takes a look at the early front runner for the Republican nominee for the Presidential race of 2016: a Shrieking White-Hot Sphere Of Pure Rage.
Well, it certainly has more charisma an innate humanity than either Mitt Romney or Paul Ryan.
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The Onion breaks the news on just what the Presidential hopeful spends his time googling.
Romney’s Terrifying Google Search History Leaked
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The Onion takes a look at What Your Amateur Porn Is Telling Employers About You. Funny, but certainly NSFW.
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Check out all the comic book related new stories The Onion has for you including a hopelessly overweight Captain America, Green Lantern’s displeasure at his Six Flags roller-coaster, and the fact that the 2012 Marvel Handbook casually reveals Peter Parker is uncircumcised.
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The Onion News Network reports on Ron Paul courting voters in his huffing, puffing, whimsical steam-powered vehicle.
Ron Paul Makes Campaign Stop In Whimsical Jalopy
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It turns out that not everyone is happy to see Peyton Manning as a Bronco. The Onion reports the Broncos current receivers are worried that they will be forced to prove they can actually catch passes now the team has a real quarterback.
Broncos Receivers Worried Peyton Manning Going To Expose How Bad They Are
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“The first and last big memory of adulthood for almost all of these young men will be failing in front of a national audience.” Welcome to March Madness.
Nation Abuzz With Prospect Of 18-Year-Old Boys Having Their Dreams Crushed
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